These thoughts

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

Title: These thoughts

Poem text:
These thoughts that distort my memories
And tinker with my dreams
Are deciphered through endless paper reams
These thoughts that stop. Me sleeping
Lead to conclusions false
My mind spinning, dancing a never ending waltz
These thoughts make and break me
Both At the same time
They wriggle from my brain
And tingle down my spine
They weigh heavy upon my shoulders
And travel down my wrists
They flutter through my fingers
And with one last clench of fists
They leave me relieved
And I no longer need to think
As they roam across the pages
As tears and smiles in ink.

Feedback:

1. Imagery: The poem effectively uses imagery to convey the weight and impact of thoughts on the speaker's life. The description of thoughts wriggling from the brain and tingling down the spine paints a vivid picture of the physical sensations associated with thinking.

2. Structure: The poem maintains a consistent structure, with each stanza containing four lines. However, there is an inconsistency in punctuation, particularly in the line "These thoughts that stop. Me sleeping." Consider revising the punctuation to maintain a consistent flow.

3. Line breaks: Some line breaks could be improved for better readability and flow. For example, the line "Both At the same time" could be combined with the previous line to create a smoother reading experience: "These thoughts make and break me, both at the same time."

4. Capitalization: There are a few instances of inconsistent capitalization, such as "Both At the same time." Ensure that capitalization is consistent throughout the poem for a polished appearance.

5. Theme: The poem effectively explores the theme of thoughts and their impact on the speaker's life. The final lines, which describe thoughts roaming across pages as tears and smiles in ink, provide a satisfying conclusion to the poem by suggesting that writing offers a form of relief and catharsis for the speaker.

Overall, the poem effectively conveys the theme of thoughts and their impact on the speaker's life. By addressing the issues mentioned above, the poem can be further refined and improved.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

As always you impress me with your amazing abilities. I love the theme of transmuting our experiences into poetry. You always have a good rhythm and rhyme pattern that both really structured but also conversational. Very nice job on this one.

Tim

one of your best! I see what Rosewood means. You do have a way with rhyme, which is my favorite mode of poetry. This is smooth, unhurried and clear. Nice job! ~ Geezer.
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Oh how I could relate to this poem.
Your rhythm is fantastic.. A wonderful poem

The pace of your poem and the rhyming structure make this an excellent read. Ruby :)