Shyanne18
Shyanne18
Jun 01, 2013

Sleep

Fighting the urge
So magnetic your pull
You always find me
Filled with your essence
I fall to my bed

Dreams erupe in vibrant color
Until it fades to black
Absent am I
Nothingness ignites
Burning away memory
As ashes quietly settle
And the pain has reseated

Eyes wide open
Day light streaming through like liquid gold
Dust sparkling between shadow
After the daze
And floating thought
I inhale sweet air
With lightness I rise

Another hopeless night
Reborn in pure morning

About This Poem

Last Few Words: Im an insomniac, and this is what it feels like to me.

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Omaha NE, USA

Favorite Poets: Too many to list. All from Frost

More from this author

Comments

Ian.T

Ian.T

11 years 11 months ago

I liked this piece, though I would have liked a few breaks in there to catch up with breathing, (At my age I need extra oxygen)
Keep writing as you do and see if you can put a couple of breaks in there, Yours Ian.T

Shyanne18

I am glad you enjoyed it. I will find places for a break :D

Nordic cloud

Did you mean erupt here? Not sure what erupe means!

"Dreams erupe in vibrant color"

You have so many interesting ways of describing things,
i love their sudden appearances, they surprise and interest me.

Love Ann