gregwa8
gregwa8
Jul 25, 2018

The Sky's Gifted Expanse

If I'm honest,
I'm looking for love
like a sunrise.

Something to light up
my whole sky,
bring color
to my dawn.
Something that feels
inevitable.

But if I am
such a lover
of the light,

shouldn't I be looking
in the night?

Bring my
half-glass-full
to one who is
thirstier
than I?

Perhaps we can meet
in the middle,
in the afternoon
when the sun
is highest
in the sky,

illuminating
all our
best and worst
traits.

A love
that is made beautiful
even in
the most ugly
and vulnerable
moments.

Our thoughts
shared
like head lamps;

romance
like white swans
in moonlight.

Drawn to each other
like dappled moths
to the flame.

Sometimes
our wings singed
by each other's
fire --

but still flying
like sea birds
off into
each day's
sunset.

You, me
and the
orange
or pink
or purple
clouds

of the sky's
gifted
expanse.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: I was wondering if the cliches get in the way of this honest love poem?

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Maryland, USA

More from this author

Comments

R

raj

6 years 9 months ago

Good poem Greg where the inner voice finds words to emote...good metaphors used as vehicles of expression...
a good poem to post on dating sites [grins]
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