Fratricidal war ravaged our terrain
The budding heroic patriots died
Pipelines exploded, many were fried
Then flushed down the public drain
Horrors which were seen by warriors
In the melee for self determination
Also by victims of national damnation
Were the departed unsung saviors
Our struggle brought new songs
For freedom and independence
To secure our continued existence
We celebrated with flutes and gongs
The forfeitures are forgotten today
We scramble for the national cake
Leaving the deprived people to rake
On fuel subsidy removal they will pay
Comments
just learned (from you) that
just learned (from you) that this is about the recent Nigerian fuel strike. u put this piece together pretty fast! hard to do, especially with rhyming.
only suggestions- capitalize the O in the title and 'melee' might be past the point of needing accents.
other than that this is a great piece and comes from true heart and belief.
keep these coming. thx.
t_f
I guess
with your comments there is no need for a footnote, I am not as fast as it appears, the strike on fuel subsidy removal made me to dust a section of an old scribble totally unrelated and without rhyme scheme, then rework it with the rhyme and direct it to the current crisis here. Part of what I desire is to be assisted on rhyme, rhythm and meter. My pieces are mostly prosaic, it waters down my poems.
Thanks for the observations and comments, I gained one or two things from you and I appreciate you time with me. Best wishes.
tr