Sorting through belongings
a good friend left behind,
I encountered a secret panel
in the back of a dusty book shelf.
Behind it was a collection of anime figurines.
All female, plastic and scantily clad, of course.
While admiring the details
of these strange but beautiful things,
his mother stepped into the room.
I was red-faced, caught in the act!
She simply smiled with a knowing look.
One that said she wished her son were still here
to appreciate his clandestine collection one more time.
As her tender reflection passed,
perhaps too painful to dwell upon,
She asked that I not be embarrassed.
"I know who my son was."
Comments
Neopoet AI (premium)
The below is a computer generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
/5
The poem "Secret Panel" presents a unique and intriguing scenario, as the speaker discovers a hidden collection of anime figurines left behind by their friend. The use of descriptive language to depict the figurines adds a layer of complexity to the poem, as the speaker is both fascinated by and embarrassed to have stumbled upon such a collection. The inclusion of the mother's reaction to the discovery adds an emotional depth to the poem, as she acknowledges her son's interests and wishes he were still alive to appreciate them.
One line edit suggestion: Instead of "I was red-faced, caught in the act!" consider "I blushed, caught in the act!" to create a smoother flow of language.
Overall, the poem effectively captures the complexities of discovering a secret collection and the emotional impact it can have on those left behind. The use of descriptive language and the inclusion of the mother's reaction add depth and nuance to the poem.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Nothing...
that I can add to this one! I agree with the AI's response and feel that you have done a fine job of making a difficult situation, a time to reflect on his mother's pain. She sounds like a lovely woman. ~ Geezer.
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Thanks Geez! Cheers
Thanks Geez!
Cheers
Thank you Geez! Best
Thank you Geez!
Best
Thanks Max! I agree as well.
Thanks Max! I agree as well.
Best
Agreed Max. Thank you for
Agreed Max. Thank you for your visit!
Best
Secret Panel
Hello, Michael,
Like most of your poetry, I just wanna sit and visit with this one awhile. Even though this is secretive, life doesn't get much more honest than what is felt here. Heartfelt final line that makes me appreciate the entire poem all the more. I agree that red-faced is much more visual and fitting for the moment.
(I do wonder about using "was" instead of "were" in the fourth line since it is referring to the singular "a collection")
L
Thanks L! Agree about the
Thanks L! Agree about the gaff in the 4th line. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this one.
Best