slim is the gesture of the night
certain atoms are always calling
scarce in their twinkle of time
I am caught in the distance between them
looking up, my feet are not bare enough
to hold me to the sky
so narrow are the walled alleyways between sight
and soul, the drift of the lights windows
against the shutters of the heart
leaving my love to scribble in the dirt
looking up... as always ...too far away
Mar 03, 2012
scribbler in the dirt
About This Poem
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
ru
addressing poet STAN??? Hopefully not
I suppose every time one of
I suppose every time one of us on Neopoet (or your other poetry sites) writes the word *loved*, you might think it's about you?
Good lord, I knew when he read it to me this morning someone would go off the deep end, looking for some dirt.
BTW, did you even read the poem?
~A
I was naive once
no more now
Loved is the word
we all hanker for
don't you?
At least some do
taken on a journey through your thought.
Up, down, in the galaxies of the night sky,
in the constellations of life's dreams
pointing in all directions
like the pin of the sundial
ever turning in motion,
I was taken on a journey
through your thought.
Ann.
lenient exposure
I like the hazy feel of this poem
and although I dont understand its
depth or meaning fully
I like the loftiness of its wording
that yearning of the middle distance
like fathoming the mirage thats always
shimmering
Thank You!
Beautifully balanced, beautifully placed & painted in imagery.
Well, it was worth the wait, a delicate poem that is also beautifully articulate (I mean that in the sense of flexability & agility, but also in a language sense) & a joy to read, I would not want to see a thing changed for my part... Beautifully balanced, beautifully placed & painted in imagery.
Hope my breath is sweet!
Cheers
A