I'm
not
goddess
Demeter
or Persephone
but I sow thoughts where summers tread
then the sunshine would bathe them warm to grow endlessly.
A Poetic Fib (Fibonacci Poetry)
About This Poem
Last Few Words: An attempt in Jess's fibonacci form of poetry. Not sure that I've captured the right idea of "enthusiastic bewonderment" though, and wasn't brave enough to go beyond the 7 th line. I thought sonnets are easier to write LOL *Demeter (in Greek ancient Myth) is the goddess of the harvest, who presided over grains and the fertility of the earth **Persephone (in Greek Myth) is Demeter's daughter, the queen of the underworld and the goddess of spring. The reference is always the Wikipedia
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Excellent attempt
I think the last word 'read' blows the sense of wonder though.
Perhaps instead of 'for a read' 'endlessly'?
jess
Thank you . I think I was ambitious to rhyme 'tread' with 'read' . Thanks for the suggestion.
Good Job Rula!
I appreciate the effort and the quality of your work in trying all these different styles.
Ron
Thanks Ron !
My pleasure you like it.