Sunku: beyond rhyme and rhythm, search for new structures in short form

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Parties & parties ( Sunku Workshop )

Fireworks
Chocolate cakes
Party is on

Bullets
Guns and missles
Party is on

More blood
Death toll's up
Party is on

About This Poem

Last Few Words: Sorry if I'm becoming more pessimistic. Crimes against the humanity in Syria is beyond what anyone would imagine

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Jordan, JOR

Favorite Poets: I favor the ones who are closer to humanity and

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

Comments

Hi Rula

A good Sunku which is in the context of the present scenario in our world.....no matter what's morally right or wrong...there are winners and loser in the game of life ,,,and life goes on...

dear Raj

V. much appreciate the read and your kind words.

Hi Rula

Such an accurate depiction of what is going on in the world today. You could try eliminating THE and just say party's on. Otherwise, great Sunku

Thank you Thadear Carrie

For your time. Edits done. Appreciate it.

when in each para you say ''party is on

coming from you Rula
would be like a paucity
of syllables form

Can I request you to your SUNKU reform
Iriz has take us all up
like a storm

Hello loved

Thank you sir for the visit. Hope it flows better now.
Appreciate it.

Well done
I love your angry message
It is not only about current events.
To me your sunku is
about how life finds a way to ignore pain when it is not a direct hit and
how inactivity and ignorance makes it worse

You're spot on

dear. You've read between the lines which few can do.
So grateful for your consistant effort, you have fulfilled all that a workshop might need.
Highly appreciate it dear.

pleasing, but not Sunku

https://vocaroo.com/i/s0QLHJdirAUG

Hello jess

Thanks for honoring me with your read.
I wonder what makes you think that it's not a sunku though.
Thank you.