Candlewitch
Candlewitch
Apr 27, 2022

Old Adam (Diabolic) by: eddy styx

Old Adam
(Diabolic)

Losing his insidious grip
how it did sweat and slip,
from his greedy clawing grasp
this slithering horned asp,
as he stung her innocent breast,
loathsome creature possessed...
of minor demon from the pits of hell
banish thy presence bid thee farewell!
Vile scourge upon this earth
ever despised since his moment of birth.
He is naught but a rancid repugnant disease
cowardly pestilence begging mercy on his knees,
this poisonous defiler and bane,
this... LOSER profane!

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Northwestern Wisconsin USA, USA

Favorite Poets: Edgar Allan Poe

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More from this author

Comments

Geezer

it may not mean what I think.
My thought is that you are portraying
men in general, from a man-hater's point of view!
Sarcasm? The words seem to writhe across the page
and sink their fangs into my brain. I read this
and wrote the comments while listening to a
Boogie Woogie duo on YouTube. Ladyva and Dr.K on piano!
[just in case you want to check it out, it's Boogie Woogie
Queen shows up for an Epic Jam.]

Your language is great, the theme interesting and
the logic seems to go from beginning to end very easily.
Great job! ~ Geez.
.

Candlewitch

"Old Adam" is one of Lucifer's many names. the poem is a personification of him in his worst aspect. I hope this explanation helps. this is eddy's view of a greater Evil. thanks for taking the time to read and critique!

ever, eddy
*hugs, Cat