The Nature of the Least

well crafted. Just a few typos

but it's thei timbre, I can't take. [their]
where each decision, might be my last; [no comma]
'tis I, when all is said...and done.. [ellipsis is to be used sparely, they are unnecessary here]
my "will" alone, won't take me thier; [there]

And now a personal note. I don't see how prayer can help any of this. Try others, or maybe, erk, therapy.

you like ellipses, fair enough, but grammatically and visually there should be a space after them.
no matter what, they do... or, say. [and the commas after 'what' and 'or', are grammatically wrong, is there a reason you want them there?]
but, my pathway seems to fade; [same with the comma after 'but', actually here an ellipsis might work]
but... my pathway seems to fade;
my "will" alone, won't take me there; [again it seems a redundant comma and you really have this thing with inverted commas! Why "will"?]

I hope you don't mind the nit-picking. I would be very curious to hear how you feel the things I think are wrong contribute to the poem. Especially in some of your other poems where you really use inverted commas a lot.

On re-reading this one I like it even more. Even the last line makes more sense to me now. I was reading with too closed a mind.

i think this is really great doc
there are a few things I want to suggest
firstly, I think the rhythm is just out in a few places – not the meter, but the feet per line

'With a | long - ing | I must } nur – ture (3 feet – six syllables)
I've a passion for the past,'

so
'I'm at | a cross| roads in | the fut | ure' (3 and a half feet – seven syllables
(now there is a way to get around this by using what are called feminine lines – but you have to have a particular meter, so we won’t go there) just drop ‘I’m’

also
' where each decision, might be my last' is also 3 and a half feet) maybe drop ‘where’

'insecure about my choices,
I'm coerced to make,'

me me me – lol ‘I’m’ and ‘my’ – too much… just me
maybe
'insecure about the choices,
I'm coerced to make,'

I can only hear their voices
but it's their timbre, I can't take'. again – too many syllables – messes with the rhythm I’d put an ellipse after voices and drop ’but’

'My agenda's never hidden
so, it's hard to make my way,

against those who make their bidding
no matter what, they do...or, say.

I'm driven to the horizon
but, my pathway seems to fade;

'tis I, when all is said...and done..
ends up, struggling against the grade. (this line, too, needs a tad work - on thought maybe 'end' without the 's')

I've unintentionally provided – even though longer again 10 syllables, it is in iambic meter, and you get away with it – very arresting
a secret glimpse inside my heart; - get away with length here because of the previous line

where I used to keep what's hidden
what can tear my mind apart. – I really like these lines

So engrossed in my own journey
my "will" alone, won't take me there;

I guess I'd better get the others
so, that we can start the war.....with, prayer !

lol again you have used all those quotation marks on words
truly doc, you don’t need them, that’s why it is called poetry – the reader reads extra meaning into the words anyway. quotation marks detract from the aesthetics

it is also only my opinion, but I avoid punctuation as much as possible in these kind of writes, semi-colons and commas, too, detract from the sight aesthetic. they are needed for story telling and other forms, but not for this write
and anyway, you have commas where they are definitely not needed

but, all that said – I repeat my first words
this is great doc
and i love the title

love judy
xxx