Sitting in my unlit window
in the dark, I watch the alley
Sweaty and yet chilled
from the scene before me
I watch the struggle and see
the gleam of a knife flashing
Once, twice, a third time
and with a muffled, gurgling sound
an indistinct form falls
limp against the dumpster
I give a start, my chair squeaks...
the murderer stares in my direction.
The Murder in Sixth Street Alley...
About This Poem
Last Few Words: This is a round-robin for 5 members here on Neo. it is an experiment to see how well a thing like this will go. If it goes well, there will be more and others will be invited to join and make their own. The rules are: 1] Each member will follow an order of appearance. 2] They will follow the story-line 3] they will be allowed 12 lines, [no more] 4] when the last person has had their turn, the story will be concluded and hopefully in a manner appreciated by all. 5] Each person will be allowed to start their own story at the end of each story. [They may decide if Free-verse or rhyme]. 6] this experiment will take a couple of weeks. We would appreciate the comments and critique of anyone on the site and may make adjustments accordingly.
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - draft
Comments
it sounds good....
I didn't realize I was holding my breath until I reached the end. the story line is thrilling! I can't wait to see what comes next! this would make a good murder mystery! will you autograph my copy?
*hugs, Cat
I guess...
we will all have to autograph each other's! LoL
~ Geez.
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Oh, You Tantalus You!
Oh, You Tantalus You!
Must admit to a Bated breath moment,
A, yeah, yeah, yeah,,,,,,,,,,
Oh, fuckin' 'ell moment.
Hope it goes well. Obi.
I am...
so glad that this seems to be intriquing to all that have responded so far. It bodes well for the experiment! Thank you for your enthusiastic response. ~ Geez.
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A good start
Can't wait to see where this goes! I'm on the edge of my seat
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Don't let it squeak...
I'm glad that it is so well recieved, I really hope that it goes well and we can continue this on a regular basis. I'm sure that you all will keep this going in an equally good fashion. ~ Geez.
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I am patiently waiting
For Rosewood's entry so I can follow. I will be watching for it tonight from work.
hey Geez,
does Tim need to be alerted to the fact that he is up next?
*hugs, Cat
I will...
do that now. I didn't think that he would need it, but...
Tim has answered...
with a brilliant piece...
*hugs, Cat
I will
Be reading Tim's piece this evening and will do my best to have my answer tonight, if not tomorrow morning.
Very good...
I know that you will be as brillant as any of us. ~ Geez.
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