lovedly
lovedly
Dec 24, 2019

Merry Christmas ...(RE-EDIT)

This one poem
must be the most captivating
you have read on Christmas
from me

so open hearted
we all must be

celebrate
Christmas as
Eid or Divali
are celebrated by
Muslims and Indians
now even world wide
by
Americans/Canadians

humanity must by now accept
we have only
one God (If at all)

The Sun is common
for all we know
it gives energy
to all that we sow
and as we grow

the Sun smiles at us

why colour caste
short and tall
do humans fuss

be it the joys
the festivities bring

Happy is the rejoicing
in the world's wide wing
Merry Xmas
it must be

this time for all humanity
universally

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: UNIVERSE...ETERNITY C/O ME, ROU

Favorite Poets: All across the Internet whom I read

More from this author

Comments

Geezer

There are those that will say that there is no god/God, and those that understand that gods are just a concept. We must all realize that concept; we are all in this together! Yes, there have been those religions and cults that believe the sun/Sol is the god that is spoken of, the father of us all. My only crit. here is that, it should be [hearted] not hearten. Oh, and the names that you give; they are not readily recognizable to the average person. [Who are they?] LoL ~ Gee.
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Geezer

I went and looked them up. I understand now, but not ALL know, only the ones that are practicing Hindus and from those parts of the world. Yeah, sometimes the computers think they know better than us. Have happy holidays and know peace. ~ Gee.
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Eumolpus

you have too much message. You have a very strong idea, a metaphor; the idea that we all accept the one sun and so should all accept the idea of the one god. This image is enough to expand into the meaning you wish to share. I think a poem should not preach so much as to imply poetic truth.

You have some strong lines like
Happy be the rejoicing
in the world's wide wing
(although "happy be" might be less awkward as "Happy is the rejoicing")

keep at it!
..