sun drags itself past pieces of broken ceramic clouds
hovering above the blanket of thick feverish wet air at sea level
as though a drop of melted butter slid off the platter
and into the great blue tablecloth leaving a stain.
the worst has passed, but the foul-smelling streets
are still partially flooded in many places
yet to completely dry.
there are patches of floating green algae beginning to clump
into masses resembling tiny islands seen from space,
while some bigger ones are reminiscent of river deltas
in the shallow obsidian glass water
obscuring parts of my reflection.
Nov 26, 2022
This poem is part of the contest:
Neopoem Of The Week Contest November 27th to December 3rd 2022
i wonder.
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - draft
Comments
i wonder.
Hello, Celso,
Visually stimulating, yet still and quiet. It leaves the reader in deep thought while taking in the view - wondering, too.
Thank you,
L
It certainly provides visuals
I can see myself surveying this scene. Sort of stoic and solemn. Nice job with the description and metaphor. Excellent vocab.
Tim
Exactly!
I'll second that the two comments above said it all! The piece is spiced with imagery, strong metaphor and personification that makes the poem stands firm. A beautiful poetic composition!
.