KINGZOMBIE
KINGZOMBIE
May 08, 2011

"Her Smile Reborn" *erotic content*

A warm breeze,
caresses her body,
touching all,
in places seldom seen.

Eyes closed,
capturing fantasy,
hands follow,
the path of lovers,
leaving fingers wet.

Baring all,
teeth clinched,
her breath stolen,
as hands remember,
forgotten ecstasies.

A pleasure reborn,
in erotic moments,
her form quivers,
sweat beads her brow.

Freedom in silence,
now broken,
primal screams,
nails tear skin.

Climax begins,
rippling in waves,
just under flesh,
as her smile is born.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: I'm still playing with freeverse.I also wanted to try the unknown, the female perspective if intimacy.I hope Ive done it justice.

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Maryland, USA

Favorite Poets: I have many favorite poets but I like Poe the most.I would also feel wrong if I didn't include music to this also

More from this author

Comments

judyanne

had to read this with my hands over my eyes lol
great write..... tasteful - just.....
but extremely good descriptive
love judy

A

Arrow

13 years 11 months ago

if writing the female perspective, it would help to write as the female (e.g., "I", "my" vs. "her"). I still get the sense of a man looking at and thinking about a woman rather than a woman experiencing. Obviously, there are all varieties of woman but when I think of writing erotica from a woman's perspective, I think of Boxer's "Innocence in Extremis" - I think an excerpt can be found on-line. Ah, it's hard to write of the intimacies of another!

Candlewitch

Indeed you have done the female view point justice! erotic and sensual without being crude or vulgar. I especially love these lines:

A warm breeze,
caresses her body,
touching all,
in places seldom seen.

Eyes closed,
capturing fantasy,
hands follow,
the path of lovers,
leaving fingers wet.

You are doing a marvelous job with free verse! Keep up the good work!

always, cat

R

raj

13 years 11 months ago

this is sensually exotic and erotically powerful write without an iota of perversion...great job...

Candlewitch

Where are you? Are you alright? You are missed!

always, Cat