Allseasonsverse
Apr 19, 2019

Hearts that See

There dwells a bit of hell when love cast a bitter spell.
What do you see when you can not break free?
Perhaps it can be unchained, will we lose what we gained?
Can love be a cushion for a world untamed?
What love is in name gives a rightful claim.
So another look at my life, knowing love is a double blade knife.
The love I know is gentle and free, and always the better part of me.
Love set me free when your love was clear to see.

About This Poem

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: NORTHEAST-USA

More from this author

Comments

A

I believe love can not be blind. Love for me is seeing and defining life with quality and value. They say love conquers all, but it does not conquer chance and it doesn't conquer death. A clear heart and mind arms the worth of life in spite of life. "Hearts that See", gives truth, value and quality in our life.

A

Love is beautiful and can bring comfort in trying time.
Love can guide us, and help us live better lives.

Eumolpus

works ok to to the last line

Love is many things but look to its flame, for peace lays in hearts that can see.

all lines count, but the last line in a poem is tantamount. This last line does not fit any of the meter or
pace established and so falls flat. Easy to fix..

otherwise, as the Beatles said...