Diagnostic

The good doctor says I’m in the middle
“Not great, but not too bad,” she says
"Fucking Russian roulette of life visits again," I say to myself

Despite the tests and the numbers,
and the dizzying array
of alien sounding terms,
my friends and family are here with me
physically, and in my anxious thoughts

You can't see them in the test results
from the blood you keep taking,
or how they help heal me in the dark hours
at 3am, where the demons lie