lovedly
lovedly
Mar 10, 2017

Deep sea dives

Into the fathoms of the ocean
my heart dives deep
and
in my palpitations speak
the beat says

Wait what are you searching
a beautiful pearl
in an oyster open
I said

Come with me spoke the tide
and said
abide with me
upon my surf do ride
what is an oyster
just a pearl
all can afford

but a surfer
is the Sea LORD
will be thee!
do Abide with the sea

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: UNIVERSE...ETERNITY C/O ME, ROU

Favorite Poets: All across the Internet whom I read

More from this author

Comments

Esker

Esker

8 years 1 month ago

or be it breathtaking
i fear water
those creepy depths
so I dove a few times
nothing like feeling
twenty five feet on
you..ears popping
the mask squashed
cold numbing spring
water or if lucky
the warmth
to find treasures
off the gov docks
wallet and odds
and ends

breaking the surface
with prizes in the net
bag..air gushing in
ears free of the
subdued dreamy
cottony sound

that dizziness of
rapture with loss
of oxygen like a
drug

wish i lived near
an ocean or sea
clam digs...
perriwinkle pots
octopus on the
barbie
that warm burn of
sun as the sea
with its salted
baptism dries
in its glitter

your writing is enriched
with much great words
and emotion

Thank U Lovedly!

Mr Wolf!

Geezer

you have written what I consider the best I have read from you! Just a little quibble, the ending seems bit muddled, maybe work it over a little. ~ Gee.
.

weirdelf

You use the 'machine gun effect".
If you write enough eventually something good will come out.
But you are a truly lousy poet.
When your 'gems' appear they are by accident.
You have a genuine desire to do good, but no real talent.
I have tried to be kind and encourage you but you really are a sexually twisted piece of shit.
Sorry.