Rula
Rula
Sep 10, 2012
This poem is part of the workshop:

Mindful Memorable Freeform: The Challenge

(Read More...)

Confidential (Mindful Memorable #4)

 Before you
I was blind
I crawled and cried
as a child

my thoughts
were mere doubts,
inner shouts
that howled
and ground my awe

until when
you intruded
and diluted
my heart
in the world
of words' art
and in you. 

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Jordan, JOR

Favorite Poets: I favor the ones who are closer to humanity and

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Comments

judyanne

rula – this is awesome

i really like the allusion to st paul’s letter in the first stanza

it sets it up perfectly for the strong feelings the persona has for this particular person or society

my only suggestion
‘and grind my awe’ – I’d make ‘grind’ ‘ground’ – to fit the tense of the rest of the stanza

very memorable in my book – especially the finish, the whole last stanza

love judy
xxx

Rula

Rula

12 years 7 months ago

St. Paul's letter dear Judy.

But I am really happy that you found this one memorable and you like it.

Very much appreciate the time for reading and commenting.Thanks again.