on a faraway island, there's a road,
in there, a roundabout that from above looks like a noose.
this road has a civilization on wheels
that always moves forward but gets nowhere.
a concrete cart carrying bricks and tools
to spread modernity's gospel to inanimate trees, heathen beasts
pulled by an army of morons and driven by some fools.
red wheels, yellow paint
civilization on a cart but its wheels are square
a roving city trapped in a circular road going nowhere
designed by those who claim to be wise men
built by those who could only count from one to ten.
a moving city of blind fanatics and sentimental fools
in the circular road, a roundabout that is shaped like a noose
on an old carriage that is falling apart
some nails are missing and most of its screws are loose.
doomed to move forward in a circle forever
setting nowhere.
Nov 12, 2022
This poem is part of the contest:
Neopoem Of The Week Contest November 6th to November 12th 2022
city on wheels.
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Ouch
…but yup pretty much sums it up doesn’t it.
Tim