as soon as Spring's in,
my heart becomes a heaven
and I got to wonder then
what She has borrowed
from the sparrow's agenda,
and what from the jasmine's.
Mar 21, 2017
This poem is part of the contest:
June Contest - Choka - Japanese Poetry - $25 (USD) Amazon Emailed Gift Card
Choka
About This Poem
Last Few Words: I wonder what happened to the contest. Where is Jonathan and Judy. I think what Jonathan started here should continue. Anyone knows about Mr. Pugilist? Anyway, I thought I'd participate anyways.
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
your poem
From Archibald Macleish this lovely work:. Pardon if you already know it!
A poem should be equal to:
Not true.
For all the history of grief
An empty doorway and a maple leaf.
For love
The leaning grasses and two lights above the sea
A poem should not mean
But be.
I certainly agree, and yet I am looking for a way to understand, to feel, this poem. Your heart has become the spring, like a physical thing. I'm trying to feel what the "agenda" is of both bird and flower in relation to your heart. There's feel there's something going on here, and I'm trying to figure it out.
Recently I saw a great cartoon, 2 people in front of an abstract expressionist painting, one saying to the other: "I said I wonder what it means, not tell me what it means..."
So without telling me what it "means", could you offer a few words to get me on the track.
with much thanks!
Hello Eumolpus
and many thanks for the time you put here trying to figure what is the poem about.
Well, I hope I didn't mess too much here as I have modified a little in the original version of the poem so as to go with contest requirements.
As you asked, I won't explain, but leave you with the original version which is really accompanied with a picture of a lass wearing all in white and holding some purple flowers,
Here is a link to it as Neopoet doesn't allow to upload images to it
http://inspirationlane.tumblr.com/post/155832739040
as soon as she's in,
his yard becomes a heaven
and he starts to wonder then
what she has borrowed
from the lavender's agenda,
and what from the jasmine's
and about "agenda" well, mmm, I don't know, it just come to me and I wanted to use a fresh word there.
Don't know if any of this makes any sense, but appreciate your visit anyway.
abstract
certianly wandered loudly as a clod through this
but I admire the subtle refinement of the lovelier things
'jasmine's' forgotten the personification of wonder
and heart taken things...
like that intimacy in the use of its pluralism
its endearing!
somewhere is spring....but tonight the wind blows
cold..was warm enough earlier...
farting about with the computers...
instead of flowers...why a man must work to be
refined.....found out i cannot just tear out a hard
drive and plug in the wires...hope for it to work
like planting succulents in the fierce sun
and wondering why my cactus frowns in the shade
will the rain just not do? no the attention is needed
the care
stuck in my ram backward and got rewarded with the
acrid plastic melting on one section..small...still
I have my small lavender bag from France the bosses
brought with them a year ago...or more...still fragrant
as ever....thankfully the comp continues minus some
of its 'mind' why I need to pay more mind
to wonderful poems as this
awaiting the return of the greenery!
but secretly still in Love with Winter!
Thank U Rula!
Odd Wolf!