Breakfast in Spring

Sunburst glows, fades

returns in tomorrow’s venue

Daffodil bursts, grows and shows

lushness amid Lenten’s darkness

Satin whiteness among leaves of green

feed my craving

as this morning’s hard boiled blossom

radiates, framed against

the spitting blackness of today’s breakfast

searing on caste iron skillet.

About This Poem

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

Comments

I'm not sure why but I really like this

some delightfully startling contrasts.

The only thing that bothers me a bit is
lushness amid Lenten’s darkness
Satin whiteness among leaves of green [amid and amongst, the repetition is a bit incongruous, but I can't see a way around it]

very effective write.

Thanks for you comment

I was trying to work on the metaphor. Will play with it in a few days and see how it looks then.