Bliss
most of all, I miss our mingled laughter
traveling the telephone lines,
burning away the many miles
of the abyss of distance between us,
your heart and mine.
your envisioned smile
took me to an elevated state of bliss
Dec 13, 2016
Bliss
About This Poem
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Very intense words and charisma
At first glance I was puzzled by the piece
Then I chose to let go of those feelings and man
What a tremendous work of art.
Historically I remembered my own relationship and could relate with a smile
The average novice would dismiss such logic but it really shows greatly in this piece
Thanks for sharing
dear Mario,
long distance relationships can be very difficult. but the phone conversations can be very warm, intimate and full of shared joy. my husband, Steven, Used work for Honeywell, who sent him out of state, to work on projects. once he was gone for two months. we talked on the phone once a week, and he sent me letters and postcards. I did the same. I still have his letters, etc. in a shoe box in my closet :) thank you for your response!
always, Cat
dear Jerry,
we also have idiot young people (newly licensed) who TEXT their idiot friends while driving. it doesn't bother me so much that they have fatalities...what bothers me is the innocent people that they take with them!
It is very cold here. not expecting it to warm up for awhile. I;m so glad you liked this poem. at least you understand what telephones were originally used for ;) LOL! hello to Lynda!
*hugs, Cat
Bliss
is a sweet vignette. It truly is a treat to commune with a loved one. Well written as one expects from the talented Candlewitch.
dear Keith,
thank you so very much :) it is very good to be appreciated! thanks for giving me a smile!
*hugs, Cat
Cat
Lovely memories, and I can equate with the sentiment, though on a different sphere, as with my PM.
I rang a Canadian in 1998 and the sound was beaut, it regenerated my Spirit to another level.
We hold onto memories and know they are worth more than gold.
Take care young Lady and hold all those lovely things they are a bouquet to the soul,
Yours as always, Ian.xx
dear Ian,
:) as you say, I do treasure the good memories. they keep my heart alive!
*major hugs, Cat
if anyone can relate....
Cat, when I read this, I saw me! You have captured everything I've been feeling for almost four years now. I know you wrote this about Steve when he used to travel, and you were without him, but it feels like you wrote it for me as well! Anyone whose ever been in a long distance relationship can relate to this beautifully, well conceived, straight from the heart, poem!
Long story short, thanks for sharing!
OX,
val
P.S. Although it's not been easy dealing with the distance, it's worth hanging in! I know he's me 24/7....he's in my heart!! :)!
my dear friend, val,
it is a bit odd, but I thought of you when I posted this! I hope that all is well for you and your special friend :) thanks for reading and commenting!
*big hugs, Cat
ha..Got that punk song in my head.."Hanging on the telephone"
song was released in 1978!
Blondie did a cover! Loved it!
mom got sick in 75 got better
but I remember talking to her
in Princess Margaret! (cancer)
Dad worked north in summers
call from smokey noisey bars
He would cry sometimes
but he was like mother a happy
fellow!
Future me ahead..I finally got
a girlfriend in post high..but
knew her in school!
dated....but the phone talks
were great! Then future
again....1987....spent hours
with a sotto intelligencia
then the lines would have a
gentle hiss....like rain..
the odd drop..or pop...
very passionate and happy
woman...but many tears...
sighs...Like Breakfest at Tiffanies
lead female crying
Smiths do a good cover of
Moon River with that soundtrack
of grief! passion!
I had a knack for writing...would
send thirty two page letters
(obligatory splash of cologne)
in Blue peacock Parker knib
one of fathers old collectives
from the fifties and later forties!
And in 2004 got on this new fangled
thing they call the Interweb where
I found many a lenient and creative
Ear...Loved the attention! unabashed
here....saved all the love letters!
Intel of the heart and soul!
Honeywell...a name I had not heard for
some time....The old stand by
like Bell Labs and Rockwell
GE and other blue stock think tanks
and production theorists!!
amazing genuises!
nothing like bright minds is there!!
front runners of creationism in technology
combined with the software for the
physical medium!
a tender write Cat!
that has plucked the heartstring
on this cold bleary but bright
and beautiful haunted
morning in canada!
The north
North Bay Ontario!
thank u!
Mr Wolf!
dear Mr. Wolf,
thank you so very much for your comments. I can tell that you put your heart and soul into them. and through them, I learn more about what a great all around person you are. happy holidays.
*hugs, Cat