Be the character
you want to be,
let your words
speak out loudly,
chant with rhythms
your melody
with rhyming verses
or of rhyme's free,
be yourself
be your poetry.
Sep 27, 2015
Be Your Poetry (Hiding in Metaphor) # 4
About This Poem
Last Few Words: I hoped here the pun with the word "character" works to represent both "a written symbol" and "a characteristic property that defines the apparent individual nature"
Style/Type: Structured: Western
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Posting again my comment
Posting again my comment since when I did it earlier, I got a rejoinder message "Access Denied"
hmmmm..trying to figure out the connection of the "Last Few Words" with the poem...i wished there was a better alternative softer word to "character" ...besides Character could also mean a role played of someone which is not representative of him/her playing it...just my perception and no more..
Regards,
Thank you raj
I wanted the words "character" as a written symbol to work together with "words", "verses" and "poetry" to make up the thematic unity that I wanted.
I also wanted the word character to refer to one's identity. Does this now make any sense?
ummmmm may be yes, yet think
ummmmm may be yes, yet think about choosing a softer alternative which also captures what you mean is just a suggestion...look for synonyms may be...
mmmm
But I can't think of one word that conveys the two meanings. Do you have the alternative raj. Hint hint.
Another take..
Just a Hint..
Live the dream
sing the melody
of an unsung song
letting the verses dance
to the rhythm of the beats
in poetic motion
Be the poem
your heart seeks
Be the poem
you breathe
and a good
Take also of almost the same metaphorical theme.
Your thoughts are always highly appreciated raj.
it was just a suggestive
it was just a suggestive attempt and no more...nothing to take away the beauty of the theme of your poem Rula...