It is not about money
or the beauty of the cloth,
it is not the way others point
either to praise, or to shame,
it is not what all the world
in all its wonder can convey.
It’s more that deep deep center
which collects the world to you.
It’s less those things coming in,
as light moving out from you.
Comments
a very tender poem
And I think a child is lucky to have a dad that can write with such direct touch. I took the liberty of some suggestions: Drop the first line, change "events" to "things" (money is not an event) and took out a "the"
It is not about money
or the beauty of the cloth,
it is not the way others point
either to praise, or to shame,
it is not what all the world
in all its wonder can convey.
It’s more that deep deep center
which collects the world to you.
It’s less those things coming in,
as light moving out from you.
thank you, I do agree with
thank you, I do agree with your changes.
Lucky Child
That was a beautiful piece of advice. I hope your child takes it to heart as I have. Thanks for a great poem.
B9Pat