Barbara Writes
By Barbara Writes, 14 September, 2016
Participants
Barbara Writes
raj
Sparrow
Skill level
Olympic Pool
Date
Barbara Writes

A new renga shop is here; bring your favorite autumn haiku, senyru, tanka to the shop. Sparrow, Ian has gotten us started.

Barbara Writes

A new renga shop is here; bring your favorite autumn haiku, senyru, tanka to the shop. Sparrow, Ian has gotten us started.

Barbara Writes

Summer's sun was lost
resting inside the Spring poem
drift into Autumn.
Autumn's colors have arrive
spring forth browns, yellows and orange

Straight up writes Barbara
I like how spring waits in thought
through winter and fall
I like your choice of earth tones
for a fall's pallette~thank you.

Barbara
Sparrow
Esker

Tanka can be about anything you want it to

Not sure of my tenses; critiques appreciated.

Come one come many, share your favorite winter poem while leaning or sharing haiku, senyru, tanka, and renga: Japanese traditional poetry

Barbara Writes

When writing haiku and senyru you must keep strict Japanese form for it to be what it is, Japanese poetry;

Haiku is strictly anything that's nature: such as the sun moon and stars. Nature also refers to animals plants and inanimate objects; it can be anything not human.

As for senyru it can be all of the above with a human touch, desire or passion: key words such as I me he she saw see my etc makes a haiku a senyru.

Tanka poetry includes both senyru and haiku; couplets added to a senyru or haiku changes it form to a tanka. Once you added your masterful poems to this workshop you've collaboratively written the fourth type of Japanese poem called renga.

alidzain

When night comes swiftly
as the reign of day shortens
in Autumn's embrace.
Witness the trees shed their leaves,
preparing for winter's coming.

Alid

alidzain

Did you PM the others about this workshop? I'm not sure if they know about it.

Alid

Barbara Writes

Summer's sun was lost
resting inside the Spring poem
drift into Autumn.
Autumn's colors have arrive
spring forth browns, yellows and orange

Straight up writes Barbara
I like how spring waits in thought
through winter and fall
I like your choice of earth tones
for a fall's pallette~thank you.

When night comes swiftly
as the reign of day shortens
in Autumn's embrace.
Witness the trees shed their leaves,
preparing for winter's coming.

The mighty Oak sleeps
Fruit and leaves scattered abroad
Bared winters garnish
I will hug its stark beauty
Wonder if it dreams as I

Barbara
Sparrow
Esker
Alidzain
Sparrow

alidzain

Autumn renga 15

Summer's sun was lost
resting inside the Spring poem
drift into Autumn.
Autumn's colors have arrive
spring forth browns, yellows and orange

Straight up writes Barbara
I like how spring waits in thought
through winter and fall
I like your choice of earth tones
for a fall's pallette~thank you.

When night comes swiftly
as the reign of day shortens
in Autumn's embrace.
Witness the trees shed their leaves,
preparing for winter's coming.

The mighty Oak sleeps
Fruit and leaves scattered abroad
Bared winters garnish
I will hug its stark beauty
Wonder if it dreams as Ilying bent, broken

lying bent, broken
from natures worst gone up-coast
by magnetic force
we cling to remaining roots
praying the earth shall hold tight

Barbara Writes

Autumn renga 15

Summer's sun was lost
resting inside the Spring poem
drift into Autumn
Autumn's colors have arrive
spring forth browns, yellows and orange

Straight up writes Barbara
I like how spring waits in thought
through winter and fall
I like your choice of earth tones
for a fall's pallette~thank you

When night comes swiftly
as the reign of day shortens
in Autumn's embrace
Witness the trees shed their leaves
preparing for winter's coming

The mighty Oak sleeps
Fruit and leaves scattered abroad
Bared winters garnish
I will hug its stark beauty
Wonder if it dreams as l

lying bent, broken
from natures worst gone up-coast
by magnetic force
we cling to remaining roots
praying the earth shall hold tight

Barbara
Sparrow
Esker
Alidzain
Sparrow

B

In the snow around
the old woman's cottage
is rarely seen some footprints

alidzain

the second verse in your haiku is lacking one syllable count while the last verse should only have 5 syllable counts. Haiku's fomat follows a strict 5-7-5 syllable count. I thought snow is only in winter, not autumn. hmmmm. You still need 2 more verses 7 syllable count lines to form the tanka. The truth is renga is a series of tanka. Tanka is haiku or senryu with added 2 verses of 7 syllable count lines.

Alid

Barbara Writes

Welcome tothe renga workshop;
Nice haiku I like;

In the snow around
the good old woman's cottage
rarely seen footprints

How you like the suggestion; add a word take a couple gives your haiku the 5/7/5 necessary format to be called haiku;
Two extra lines of 7 syllables each will make your beautiful haiku a tanka; have an idea what you might add to this masterpiece;

thanks for joining

Obadiah Grey

As Winter slaps the arse of Autumn-
and lambs no longer bleat,
I'm glad I saw these socks n bought 'em-
I got really frigid feet.

(Sorry 'bout that !)

Obi.

Barbara Writes

Interesting autumn poem, it has a great senyru ring;
Japanese poetry such as haiku, senyru, tanka, and renga follow specific formats:
senyru 5/7/5 haiku 5/7/5 tanka 5/7/5/7/7 syllables per line; and renga is a combination of all five forms.

That's what's this workshop is about, writing, sharing and learning 5 forms of Japanese poetry collaboratively written by many poets.
With that said this is just a suggestion to get you started.

As Winter slaps arse
of Autumn lambs no more bleat
glad I saw these socks
and bought 'em from the market
I got really frigid feet

This makes the first 3 lines senyru and last 2 lines couplet; making the whole poem a tanka ready for the renga. Wonderful poem. I love the socks added in bc frigid feet don't feel good lol.

Esker

Esker

8 years 5 months ago

other work shops berate their participants and delete
the thread...
so all the hard work gone out the window
Or just dont answer the work of the poet....

Ur the only strong stable working poet here
from what I can tell....
and Ive been at the Business in the real world
where people work and do little whinning
..
Ive been having issues today logging in...
If its just me then its just a personal
blocking via corrupt officials
nothing new...
so If I lost contact with U via
others wishes..
I want to say its been a blast
and not MY want to leave
this great place
..

Perhaps someone could
ask the OWNERS and
people that actually
Run this place to check
into this for me...

thank U Barbara
I wish to add more
but fear I might be
blocked here yet
again..

thank U
Mr Esker!

chevyvent

Makes me think of nature in a totally different way
Filled with the twists and turns of everyday life
Very well written & I applaud your effort

Workshop: Collaborative Poetry Writing (Renga)

Description: This is a meeting place for all poets on Neopoet to read, learn and write collaboratively poetry. In this workshop you will learn to write (4) four forms of Japanese poetry.
Poets would also come together and co write any poem of their choosing.

1. Haiku three lines of poetry written with 5/7/5 syllables
2. Senyru three lines of poetry written with 5/7/5 syllables
3. Tanka five lines of poetry written with 5/7/5/7/7 syllables
4. Renga a string of tanka poems from two or more poets.

Leader: Barbara Writes
Co Leader: Alidzain
Moderator(s) Raj

Objective: The object of this workshop is to bring poets together in a whimsical workshop to write collaborative poetry. Bring your creativity and imagination.

Level of expertise: Open to all.

Subject matter: The moderator will choose his/her theme for the poem. It can be about anything you choose. Whatever the theme it'll be based on (3) three Japanese styles of writing poetry; haiku, senyru and tanka.

Ex. Tanka
I know not the name
Of local wind where I live
Research must be fun

Learning about surrounding
Of others brings together.

Ex. Haiku
The silver moon hid
Quickly behind dark grey skies
Birds south for winter

Ex. Senyru
Early November
Snow is falling in New York
Covers Watertown