I like my whiskey always neat
a single malt goes down a treat.
Within my grasp, or very near
A Speyside brand will always cheer,
not to say it’s not as good
a Highland type will lift my mood.
Then again, an Island tipple
makes my taste buds smoothly ripple.

All blended whiskeys have their faults
so I will stick with purest malts.

A dinae ken ma purage frae ma ale
Ma heed is burlin roon, a canae stan’
A’m no the yin tae swalie toast sae stale
an’ cannae yet get up withoot a han’