emogothgirl
emogothgirl
Dec 07, 2011

look me in the eye

i guess
i'm never gonna sleep tonight
never gonna get it right
lost me in the sound of my only escape

and the
bass is getting louder
treble take me higher
singing myself wings maybe i'll fly away

(chorus)
and i'd beg
for someone to follow
would my life get any easier?
no i'll never be like her
but how?
they said just talk it out
how do you expect our ways to change
when he can't even look at me

i guess
he's never gonna get it out
never even let me in
lost me in the sound of our every day

maybe
it couldn't have been wronger
couldn't last longer
every time i say it
i know he wouldn't change

(chorus)

About This Poem

Last Few Words: NOT done. at all. had to type furiously with mother over shoulder. ugh.

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: somewhere in the middle of the mountains, USA

Favorite Poets: life.

More from this author

Comments

wesley snow

Do you have a melody for this? I have three places in my epic where characters sing and I had the temerity to produce melodies for the songs. One of them is even pretty good.
"... it couldn't have been wronger." is superb. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. I have always enjoyed nonce words and a healthy abuse of terms for our poetry. This is perfect.
Please don't let me miss the revisions on this.
wesley