scribbler
Sep 07, 2011

FINAL? THOUGHTS

They say that I've been sick a while
that things like this are slow to grow
message delivered with a false smile
behind their eyes I think they know

Too many years, too much excess
health advisories unheeded
(I thought that they were all unneeded)
but I'm proven wrong, I guess
far too often I said yes

So here I lie in sterile room
no choice but take this final chance
hoping surgeons now can thwart my doom
as anesthetic feeds into I.V.

Never been so scared before
Will this be my final sleep?
If so, where will I wind up?
Is there somewhere To wind up?
Now telling me to count backward
ONE HUNDRED
Ninety Nine
ninety eight
scared.....
wha------------------------

Second example of morphing poetry

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: South Carolina, United States, USA

Favorite Poets: Frost

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

More from this author

Comments

Geremia

DITTO to Lonnie's comment.

joe

It is not death we fear--it's the process that sucks.

Not to worry, Stan [if this poem s fo real. One step at a time.

S

I am flattered in a strange way that people thought this accurate enough to be based upon experience. I AM FINE. Just extrapolated upon the only time I was ever put under for surgery. Thank you for your concern............stan

loved

loved

13 years 7 months ago

Including Shirley and mine
We were worried
All this while,
As you hadn't commented
In your own style

Though I am aware
You have to be read three
Is to one
Maybe none
But Stan don’t make us run,
Surgery is no fun,
Life has to be lived well
Ere we all go to the knell,
I won't say heaven or hell,
As in both
Through life's sojourn
Here alone we dwell.