Ruby Lord
Ruby Lord
Nov 21, 2023
This poem is part of the workshop:

Earn A Poem Workshop 2

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LIFE’S BETTER WHEN YOU IGNORE THE SHIT

To rise each day, use a curtain alarm,
it saves you from pain and personal harm.
Allows you to arrive at unhurried pace,
and celebrate slowly, coming last in the race.
Each morning a comedy, free of ill humours,
Secured in whispers, not celebrity rumours.

With stories unfolding, innuendos expand,
And every reporter, shakes dysentery hand,
To chat over cow muck, the snake oil salesman,
In game of banter, to buy and sell you again.
But I’m as happy as shit on a rock,
Late out of bed, daylight savings o’clock.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: I'm learning to create a better life through being more laid back and not getting stressed about our political systems and candidates. I'm going to get up naturally and take a deep breath and let the bull sh!t wash away while I smile, and if this hits the mark with you, I'm happy. Ruby :)

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: United Kingdom

Favorite Poets: I like Margaret Atwoods poetry and I enjoy her writing. She has a natural ability to make her fiction read like poetry

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neopoet

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "LIFE’S BETTER WHEN YOU IGNORE THE SHIT" employs a satirical tone to critique societal norms and media influence. It utilizes a variety of poetic devices, including rhyme, rhythm, and metaphor, to convey its message.

The poem's structure is consistent, with each stanza containing four lines. This regularity aids in the flow of the poem and makes it easier for the reader to follow. The rhyme scheme is also consistent, which adds a rhythmic quality to the poem.

The use of metaphor and simile is prevalent throughout the poem, particularly in lines such as "And every reporter, shakes dysentery off hand" and "But I’m as happy as shit on a rock". These lines add a layer of complexity to the poem and invite the reader to delve deeper into the text to understand its meaning.

The poem's language is colloquial and informal, which fits well with the satirical tone. However, some lines could be more concise to improve clarity. For example, the line "To chat over cow muck, they’re snake oil sales men" could be simplified to "Chatting over cow muck, they're snake oil salesmen".

The poem's theme of rejecting societal norms and media influence is clear and effectively conveyed. However, the poem could benefit from a more explicit exploration of this theme. For instance, the poem could delve deeper into the speaker's reasons for rejecting these norms and influences, or it could explore the consequences of this rejection.

In conclusion, the poem effectively utilizes a variety of poetic devices to convey its satirical critique of societal norms and media influence. However, it could benefit from more concise language and a deeper exploration of its theme.

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Geezer

it takes to make you happy, you should be ecstatic here! You have kept the meter within a reasonable one beat
[and hardly noticeable] plus or minus and the rhyme is excellent. ~ Geez.
.

Ruby Lord

Hi Mark, thank you for reading and commenting. I only hope you are off the floor now and on your way to a full recovery?
Take care, Ruby :) xx

Unca Fez

This echoes something I learned a long time ago and I refresh, occasionally, with a couple of thoughts:
1. I was looking for a job when I found this one.
2. If they ask me to dig a hole, I dig a hole. If they ask me to fill it in, I fill it in. The pay's the same either way.
It's kept me sane at work for a lot of years.

Your approach to life should allow you to live happily for as long as your body lets you.

Ruby Lord

Hi Steve, thank you for your read and comments.
Your first point reminds me of The Smiths song, Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now as it starts with:
I was looking for a job and then I found a job, and heaven knows I'm miserable now.
And your second point is proof that a clever man knows when to stay quiet. I love it, Ruby :) xx

Candlewitch

I tripped over the first line of your poem, unsure of the meaning. A curtain alarm, does it mean being awoken by the sun shining through your window? I hope I have guessed correctly. Your title made me *smile, and I enjoyed the whole topic declaration! Keep on writing and I will keep on reading and appreciating.

p.s.
I am OCD (amongst a few other mental illnesses) so this was great to read! thanks!

*hugs, Cat

Ruby Lord

Hi Cat, yes that's exactly right, the light that creeps through the edges of the curtains and wakes me up in the morning. I am not an early riser, we don't have an alarm clock in the bedroom anymore so everything is pitch black until the sun comes up. Thank you for your comment and question. I like being in bed until I wake up naturally, it makes life less stressed. Ruby :) xx

Lamington

I am not sure "happy as shit on a rock" works really. Why would a turd be happy on a rock where it would dry out?