A walk in the park
Gives us time to think and pray
To view our planned day
It provides us thoughts
About ourselves and others
What to change or keep
Place to be alone
To note the beauty of life
And our part in it
A walk in the park
Gives us time to think and pray
To view our planned day
It provides us thoughts
About ourselves and others
What to change or keep
Place to be alone
To note the beauty of life
And our part in it
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Neopoet AI (premium) - 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
The poem "Walk In The Park" is structured as a series of Haikus, a traditional form of Japanese poetry. This structure is maintained throughout the poem, with each stanza adhering to the 5-7-5 syllable pattern.
In terms of content, the poem explores the idea of a walk in the park as a space for introspection and contemplation. The use of simple, direct language effectively conveys this theme. However, the poem could benefit from more specific imagery to make the scenes more vivid and engaging for the reader. For example, instead of stating "To note the beauty of life", the poem could describe specific aspects of life that are beautiful.
The poem also uses the concept of a walk in the park as a metaphor for self-reflection and contemplation. This metaphor is clear and consistent throughout the poem. However, the poem could delve deeper into this metaphor, exploring the nuances and complexities of the thoughts and feelings that arise during a walk in the park.
The poem's rhythm is consistent, with each line flowing smoothly into the next. This creates a calm, contemplative tone that complements the poem's theme. However, the poem could benefit from more varied sentence structures to create a more dynamic rhythm.
Overall, the poem effectively communicates its theme through its structure, language, and metaphor. However, it could be improved by incorporating more specific imagery, delving deeper into its metaphor, and varying its sentence structures.
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Nice string
Senryu stings can be difficult to compose. You pretty much hit it out of the park, pun intended.
Tim
Thank you. For reading and
Thank you. For reading and commenting. I have been experimenting g with this type of poetry combining stanzas using haiku form etc.
Thanks again