Autumn rain at the midnight hour,
I wait for you,
Ghosts of the past pleading for me to leave,
But I am shackled by the thought of you,
The world begrudge,
The last train awaits,
I wait,
But the chains of society have become too heavy for you,
So a visit from sacrifice,
That gifted you fear,
Has caused you to forget my name,
So I journey towards my fate,
Alone and nameless,
My heart betrayed.
Nov 14, 2022
This poem is part of the contest:
Neopoem Of The Week Contest November 13th to November 19th 2022
Last Train
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Not actively editing
Comments
Nice write
Nice write
There are some tenses that need corrections because you used narrative technique.
You're on the track...
Thx for the feedback! :)
Thx for the feedback! :)
Last Train
I am not certain of the direct meaning of the poem, but the language is sobering, and sad. The last three lines are especially somber, and along with the title, leave a feeling of grief and loss.
Thank you,
L
Thx :)
Thx :)