Selfish desire in paint streaks
Across the sky
Reaching finger tips
But only for a moment
To brush them across
And into a complex tapestry
That leads down a tall tale road
From here, to fall
Into swirls of color and life
With gray tones hidden beneath
Bursts take form to consume
And try to eat a soul.
Is the meaning of life
To avoid human nature
Or to spin out,
Then come back home.
Aug 21, 2022
What Life Means to me
About This Poem
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Hello Abby,
I enjoyed the color and painting imagery of your poem. It reminds me of a Van Gogh painting for sure.
If I could make a suggestion, on the lines:
Bursts take form to consume
And try to eat a soul.
"consume and try to eat" feels redundant. These lines might be stronger as
Bursts take form to consume
A soul
Just something for you to consider if you decide to revise.
Take care,
Kelsey.