scooby
scooby
Aug 26, 2020

Faith

We learn to see beauty in the rain.
We are taught to let go of the pain.
Day in, day out, another demon has been slayn.
One mans loss is another mans gain.
Everyday we have to refrain,
From ever thinking our life will be plain.
Listen to what the Bible has been sayin’.
For each other we will be prayin’.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: This is my poem about my path with a chronic illness I’ve been struggling with. I can’t keep foods down at night and I’m having many tests run on me. This poem explains how I stay happy and hopeful through the struggle. I’m not very good with grammar and spelling, so I would appreciate help on that. Thank you for reading and I hope anyone who is struggling with serious illness can relate.

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: yuma az

Favorite Poets: Neil Hilborn

More from this author

Comments

Lavender

Hello, there,
Thank you for sharing what I'm sure is just a small portion of what you are going through. Very powerful title wrapped up in very powerful words.
Best wishes to you,
Lavender

Gracy

Gracy

4 years 7 months ago

Hi scooby, Alan has already pointed out the same things I'd have said, so no more crits. Your poem is indeed powerful and shows that you have great inner strength as well as faith.
I do emphasize with you, because not only some of my family, but I also have a chronic disorder. Mine can be painful, it's called Fibromyalgia, but not usually too serious. Just disrupts my life and have to take some pain killers.
Your title, content and spacing are fine. I wish you all the best with your tests. Keep writing, for me it's a sort of therapy.
All the best, Gracy