the Ferris wheel
picked us up
the bottle toss
was a ringer
the horses took a
victory lap
and our hot dogs
were topped
with relish
Oct 01, 2018
With Relish
About This Poem
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Greg
sounds like fun pure and simple brings back younger days
love a trip to the fair!
love a trip to the fair!