through stony rooftops
brazen windows
and heavy doors
the stars don’t shine
yet still we sit
laughing
as we lift to our lips
a dangerous cocktail
of greed, boredom
and ageing whiskey
it runs cooly
over our twisted tongues
my breathing
covers the walls
and i stagger
stagger, through a labyrinth
of wire hedges
barbs ripping open
any chance
of feeling alive
ha! how naïve
only now we realise
we were waiting
for 1987
for big brother
for control
our tired knees
trembled with fear
and as we watched
vigilant as crows
they lured us
into a broken cell
of corroded pleasure
and a brave new world
all the while
preaching
it’s ok
everything’s ok
Comments
I like,
I like the feel of this poem, the hint of danger, that we're sleep walking through life. And not really taking part in what is happening around us. I think this maybe the first of your poems i've read if so i enjoyed this very much. And a heartfelt welcome to Neopoet. Regards Roscoe....
hello Nick
Ditto, what Roscoe said
It reads really smoothly
I'm at a kind of loss as to the theme,
at first I thought you were talking about a war
Then '87 and big brother -you can't be talking about Hawke...
and the end had me flummoxed
Lol - sorry if I'm a little thick, but I still liked the read :)
love judy
xxx
Roscoe and Judy
Already covered what I was going to say lol. Yet I Do still have one suggestion. Think a bit on whether "brazen" is the right word to use in line 2. You are talking about a window through which starlight can' shine and I think there might well be a better description : smoked, obscure, tinted, blacked out, just for starters...........stan