Hurt, wounded,
Fell off a train.
Bruised and sore,
Don't think I'll ever
go there again.
Let it go,
Slide off those rails
Remind yourself of better climes -
Happier times,
and be on your way...
Hurt, wounded,
Fell off a train.
Bruised and sore,
Don't think I'll ever
go there again.
Let it go,
Slide off those rails
Remind yourself of better climes -
Happier times,
and be on your way...
Last Few Words: Just a little "pick me up" sticky note for the day! ;
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Hi NS
This is a positive poem about moving on after being terribly hurt. The imagery is punchy in as much as it is very difficult and painful to get over the physical trauma of falling off a train. The memory off that pain would certainly make you more cautious about getting on a train again. Thus highlighting the trauma of a bad relationship.
( Course I could be barking up the wrong tree in my interpretation of your poem ).
Love Mand xxxx
think of me when it hurts
think of me when it hurts
I have faced greater misery
worth it's worth
and
having experienced more than most ,
still upon mankind's wisdom and folly
I boast
alas some understand some don't ,
move on is all I say
none can have one's way
sigh... ;)
You two are SO spot on!!
Thanks guys!
for bolstering my flagging ego too!
NS
my Ego is a tool
as you will learn more and more
tis the iron pillar
of Amazon
if there were one ...
else Ashoka's he had many