William Saint George
William Saint George
Feb 25, 2013

Coldness

Hopeless flies
the arrow
hard
against the wind,

a cry in the distance
of the desolation
of a desperate heart,

a sudden stop
within the enigmatic
eye of the storm.

The revolution
passes by,
and silhouetted faces
smile,

furrowed brows
masked by shadows,
and cloaks of falsehood
like a masquerade.

The drum rolls,
and bells toll
with an uncertain harmony.

Alone,
I sit on an iceberg,
and watch the loveless sea,
as the continents
float away into my dreams.

Take the children in,
and drain the blood.

There'll be carnage
in a bit.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: A bit too abstract.

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Ghana, GHA

Favorite Poets: William Shakespeare

More from this author

Comments

William Saint George

This poem is very personal, and I wrote it just when I was in the mood it portrays.

The line "the revolution passes by" is actually the core of the poem, and could pass as a title.

The last bit borders on the suicidal/self destructive.

Sitting on an iceberg, I thought, evoked coldness, loneliness and isolation.

Thanks for your comment.